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September 4, 2014 / Randall

to all the girls I’ve shunned before

…even when my conscious brain tells me that someone is safe and that they want to get to know the real me and that they’re not going to hurt me, my subconscious (limbic) brain doesn’t believe it. This part of me still cowers before the shame stick, even when it isn’t there.

And later…

I now recognize this pattern and understand where it comes from. It was rooted in awful theology which got branded into me by white hot shame.


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